line edits

Author: mcasperson

_includes/pe_value.html

@@ -1,6 +1,6 @@
 <h1><a id="pevalue">The Value of Platform Engineering</a></h1>
 
-<p>Despite being a relatively new field, studies, articles, and anecdotes demonstrate this paradigm's value to
+<p>Despite being a relatively new field, studies, articles, and industry examples demonstrate this paradigm's value to
     engineering organizations.</p>
 
 <p>This chapter is most useful for organizations considering establishing a platform team, as such a request requires a
@@ -124,7 +124,7 @@ <h2>Quantifying the Business Value</h2>
     is measurable. Defining measurable values involves answering questions like:</p>
 
 <ul>
-    <li>How much money will be earned from new features delivered as a result of the increased performance of the DevOps
+    <li>How much money will be earned from new features delivered as a result of the increased performance of DevOps
         teams?
     </li>
     <li>How much reputational risk is reduced by standardizing security practices across all projects?</li>
@@ -160,7 +160,7 @@ <h2>Spare Time Platform Teams</h2>
 
 <h2>Example Checklist</h2>
 
-<p>The checklist below provides a simple example describing how an IDP may positively impact core business
+<p>The checklist below provides a example describing how an IDP may positively impact core business
     requirements.</p>
 
 <table>
@@ -177,8 +177,8 @@ <h2>Example Checklist</h2>
             Risk
         </td>
         <td>
-            <p>An internal review identified 15 dependencies used in production applications rated as critical. These
-                vulnerabilities expose the company to data breaches and denial of service attacks. The current process
+            <p>An internal review identified 15 dependencies used in production applications with vulnerabilities rated as critical. 
+                These vulnerabilities expose the company to data breaches and denial of service attacks. The current process
                 of discovering vulnerabilities is reactive and ad-hoc, leaving production applications vulnerable for
                 many months.</p>
 
@@ -208,7 +208,7 @@ <h2>Example Checklist</h2>
             <p>DevOps teams have identified that time spent waiting for infrastructure provisioning contributed at least
                 four weeks to this release time.</p>
 
-            <p>By exposing self-service infrastructure provisioning, the IDP aims to reduce release times by 10%,
+            <p>By exposing self-service infrastructure provisioning, the IDP will reduce release times by 10%,
                 allowing up to 3 new features to be released per year, resulting in the completion of 5 additional deals
                 worth 75k per year.</p>
         </td>
@@ -219,4 +219,5 @@ <h2>Conclusion</h2>
 
 <p>Organizations looking to introduce a platform team must present a compelling business case for an IDP and the
     platform team responsible for it. This chapter provides insights into the benefits of platform engineering based on
-    industry reports and distills business value down to three pain points to attach quantifiable value to.</p>
+    industry reports and examples. We then distilled business value down to three pain points to attach quantifiable value to, 
+    with an example checklist teams can use when pitching a platform team to their organization.</p>